Santa can be vexing. Not the actual jolly old elf, who is nothing but generous and good natured. But the concept of the Santa legend has challenges for every generation, and if you’re now a parent or grandparent with an impressionable youngster who is itching to go all out on Christmas, it’s good to get ready for the questions. And there will be many of them.
To review: Santa Claus (or St. Nick or Kris Kringle — he has lots of aliases) has one simple job, which is to deliver gifts to good children. All the good children, all over the world. On one night. His delivery system involves leaving his home at the North Pole (!) in a sleigh pulled by eight or nine reindeer and he leaves these presents in the houses he visits, which he gains access to through the chimney. I repeat: All over the world in one night. An unknown number of elves work throughout the year to make mostly toys for the children and Santa is somehow aware of every child’s deportment, to which he assigns either a “naughty” or “nice” designation. And this is how grownups typically exert leverage.
You can see how logic is already being strained, and how power dynamics develop, but fortunately, the target audience is very young. And we have the accompanying concept of magic to help out when rationality falters.
With such an arbitrary and capricious back story, it’s no wonder (but often wonderful) how the variations have evolved. New stories emerge every year, there are many versions of his famous red and white suit that Coca-Cola practically made into a standard. What still remains as constants are his tendency to mirth with “Ho Ho Ho!” as his tagline, his love of cookies, and his generosity. Whatever liberties some stories have taken, it always comes back to kindness. Even Billy Bob Thornton’s Bad Santa experienced traces of redemption. (But don’t let the kids see those movies, for goodness’ sake.)
The key for grownups is to show children how being kind and behaving are the way to go. But maybe don’t weaponize it, grandpa. Santa should be seen as someone who delights in effort and growth, not perfection.
As for the gifts, don’t let the obsession ruin the spirit of the holiday. Make it clear that Santa’s magic is governed by appropriateness. The elves won’t feed that pony and the budget may not handle that $1,500 gaming system. Maybe find something that brings joy and contentment without using a payment plan. On the other hand, do better than an orange and socks.
Have fun with the little ones when laying the groundwork of who Santa is and what he represents. He’s reachable (write a letter!) and his lessons are teachable. But know that eventually a child will begin to figure out the true existential nature of the legend. And their discussions will be highly philosophical as the Santa folklore becomes less coherent to the growing young mind. Let it play out. Emphasize the spirit of Santa, with the idea of goodness and giving, over the literal figure. And do it over cookies and milk.
If you have youngsters of varying ages, imagine doing a project where they earn points for doing good deeds and learning about the pleasures of giving as well as getting. It’s something they can get involved in and track, it builds character, and presents the best of what we like in Santa Claus.
What a great gift to give a thinking child.