Dreamstime
Being a parent is hands down the best job, but it can be taxing. My husband and I go 100 miles a minute until our heads hit the pillow and usually in different rooms due to our schedules and children. He is a restaurant manager, which means his hours are not set and sometimes he’s home and sometimes he’s not. I worked in restaurants for 10 years prior to my role at CMi now so I get it, but that doesn't necessarily make it any easier.
We recently were able to get away. We took a quick trip to Nashville and stayed at the Gaylord Opryland resort and were able to catch up with some of our best friends. We had a wonderful time. Our one afternoon, we had a chance to tool around on Broadway and did something neither of us get to do together anymore — have a drink in a bar!
Not to get this story twisted, I literally missed my boys before we dropped them off to stay with their grandparents. I probably went through my pictures 25 times in less than the 48 hours we were away. We passed by so many cute families and would glance at each other and smile, as well as smile hugely at the passing parents, which, looking back, may have freaked some out. Adam, the husband, even thumbs-upped one mom who was allowing her children to go up and down some stairs. It would be an understatement to say we missed our children, but for the first time in a LONG time, we were able to spend time with each other for hours on end and talk about topics we didn't have to kid-edit.
I left realizing something I often forget: It is important to have that time. I know it is not easy for all due to childcare or finances, but if you can figure it out, even just have the kids stay a few hours or one night away so that you and said spouse can live for a few hours like you were just married — hold hands, have a meal, watch a TV show with cursing in it (!). You can't forget how much you need each other in a healthy relationship.
I try to remind myself too that we are to raise these little humans to go out into the world independently in due time and they will not always need us in the ways they need us now. The person that is going to be there and will have been there with you through it all is this spouse person. They will be there when your kids go off to college or out into the workforce where they will begin the search for their own purpose. I am not condoning unhealthy relationships here; there are many scenarios you live happily ever after with someone other than the bio-parent of your kids or what have you. Just take a minute to remember who you are and who they are. You really liked them at one point before all the responsibilities hit you hard and you forgot to take time for each other. I'll be the first to admit, I go through times at home where I don't see Adam for two or three days and I start to resent him a little, but I hope to remember what I am writing and feeling now in a few months time when I want to pull my hair out again.
One of my favorite quotes that hits home here is: “People change and forget to tell each other.” by L Hellman. We have to make time for each other somehow, someway.
What are some of your favorite quotes that get you through this thing called a balanced life?